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The Scars That Have Shaped Me: How God Meets Us in Suffering Paperback – October 12, 2016

4.8 out of 5 stars 548 ratings

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Twenty-one surgeries by age thirteen. Years in the hospital. Verbal and physical bullying from schoolmates. Multiple miscarriages as a young wife. The death of a child. A debilitating progressive disease. Riveting pain. Abandonment. Unwanted divorce.

Vaneetha Rendall Risner begged God for grace that would deliver her. But God offered something better: his sustaining grace.

In The Scars That Have Shaped Me, published by Desiring God, Vaneetha does more than share her stories of pain; she invites other sufferers to taste with her the goodness of a sovereign God who will carry us in our darkest of days.

“Vaneetha writes with creativity, biblical faithfulness, compelling style, and an experiential authenticity that draws other sufferers in. Here you will find both a tested life and a love for the sovereignty of a good and gracious God.” –JOHN PIPER

“A special kind of wisdom. Nothing short of remarkable. You’ll see the unmistakably hard but truly beautiful stuff God is doing in your own life.” –JONI EARECKSON TADA

“I could not put this book down, except to wipe my tears.” –GLORIA FURMAN

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Product details

  • Publisher ‏ : ‎ CreateSpace Independent Publishing Platform (October 12, 2016)
  • Language ‏ : ‎ English
  • Paperback ‏ : ‎ 200 pages
  • ISBN-10 ‏ : ‎ 1539506584
  • ISBN-13 ‏ : ‎ 978-1539506584
  • Item Weight ‏ : ‎ 8 ounces
  • Dimensions ‏ : ‎ 5.25 x 0.46 x 8 inches
  • Customer Reviews:
    4.8 out of 5 stars 548 ratings

About the author

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Vaneetha Risner
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Vaneetha Rendall Risner is passionate about helping others find hope and joy in the midst of suffering. Her story includes contracting polio as a child, losing an infant son unexpectedly, developing post-polio syndrome, and going through an unwanted divorce, all of which have forced her to deal with issues of loss.

She and her husband Joel live in Raleigh, North Carolina and have four daughters between them. Vaneetha holds degrees from the University of Virginia and Stanford and is hoping to use them someday! She is the author of the book, The Scars That Have Shaped Me: How God Meets Us in Suffering and is a regular contributor to Desiring God. She blogs at www.danceintherain.com although she doesn’t like rain and has no sense of rhythm.

Customer reviews

4.8 out of 5 stars
548 global ratings

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Customers say

Customers find this book encouraging and well-written, with chapters that stand alone, making it easy to read. They appreciate its honesty and authenticity, describing it as a gift from God. The book receives positive feedback for its timing, with one customer noting it wasn't rushed.

AI-generated from the text of customer reviews

58 customers mention "Encouragement"55 positive3 negative

Customers find the book inspiring and well-presented as a treatise on suffering, with one customer noting how it comforts readers by redirecting them to relevant scripture.

"...She draws her strength from the Lord and writes in a way that gives a new angle to the joy of suffering. Her journey has been incredibly difficult...." Read more

"I can't say enough about this book; a very genuine and straightforward account of trusting God from someone who has had more than their share of..." Read more

"...Thank you Vaneetha for a cogent, well-presented treatise on suffering, prayer, loss and heartache --and that you did not descend into gloom or..." Read more

"...imprinting her heart on the pages of this text, it was redeeming for me in specifc areas and strengthening...." Read more

58 customers mention "Readability"58 positive0 negative

Customers find the book highly readable, describing it as wonderful and encouraging, with one customer noting how purely honest it is.

"As someone who is in pain 100% of the time, this book drew me in immediately...." Read more

"The story is heartbreaking yet beautiful. Encouraging words of wisdom...." Read more

"...Wonderful book, highly recommended!" Read more

"I love this book...." Read more

14 customers mention "Writing style"14 positive0 negative

Customers appreciate the writing style of the book, finding it well written and easy to read, with one customer noting that each chapter stands alone.

"...Her journey has been incredibly difficult. The manner she writes is short chapters that could literally take 10 minutes to read...." Read more

"I downloaded this book last Friday (11/04/16) to my PC Kindle. I read it slowly, with the text on one-half of my screen and my e-Sword Bible on the..." Read more

"...EVER! Vaneetha's gifted writing hits home personally...." Read more

"...The personal tone of the book and the short chapters make it a perfectly suitable gift to give someone in the midst of suffering...." Read more

10 customers mention "Honesty"10 positive0 negative

Customers appreciate the author's honesty and sincerity in the book.

"...Vaneetha writes in a style that is honest and raw, a style that is much appreciated...." Read more

"I love how this book digs deep, speaks truth, and gives such real hope...." Read more

"...You will be strengthened through Risner's words and pointed towards God's Word...." Read more

"...The transparent and authentic words of the author, often pointing to scripture as the source of her daily strength, will be an encouragement to..." Read more

8 customers mention "Authenticity"8 positive0 negative

Customers appreciate the authenticity of the book, describing it as real and excellent in condition.

"I can't say enough about this book; a very genuine and straightforward account of trusting God from someone who has had more than their share of..." Read more

"...She doesn't sugar coat the pain and suffering as some authors do. She is real...." Read more

"Vaneetha has offered up a real gift to us. She has beautifully crafted, out of her own brokenness, pain, and suffering, words which are like the..." Read more

"...The author shares her struggles in a very raw, real way...yet her story is hopeful and doesn’t leave you feeling heavy...." Read more

6 customers mention "Gift value"6 positive0 negative

Customers find the book to be a gift from God, with one mentioning it's particularly helpful for friends struggling with pain.

"...The personal tone of the book and the short chapters make it a perfectly suitable gift to give someone in the midst of suffering...." Read more

"Vaneetha has offered up a real gift to us...." Read more

"...Makes a great gift for friends struggling with pain etc." Read more

"...Your book is truly a gift from God and a blessing to so many." Read more

4 customers mention "Timeframe"4 positive0 negative

Customers appreciate the timing of the book, with one noting it was not rushed and another mentioning it arrived just when they needed it.

"...this text...like a 4-course meal, it is to be appreciated and not rushed. God's strength and hope be with you." Read more

"Timely, gentle and thoughtful. I bought two of these and will be buying more to keep on hand for gifts...." Read more

"Book was just at the right time to handle a deep lon lasting pain. It comforted me by redirecting to relevant scripture. God renews me daily...." Read more

"In our hurried life this is an easy, quick and makes you think book. Buy it!..." Read more

Future Glory
5 out of 5 stars
Future Glory
At the time I am writing this review, the COVID-19 crisis has claimed countless lives, disrupted our way of living, and has brought about unprecedented pain and suffering. In The Scars that have Shaped Me, Vaneetha Rendall Risner shows how God meets us in suffering.Dark DaysOnly Risner could write this book. Since contracting polio as an infant, she has endured much. 21 surgeries by age 13, countless years in the hospital, miscarriages, the death of a child, and a debilitating progressive disease are only some of her stories of pain. And she uses these stories to share the goodness of God.The book is broken up into 3 sections and structured around key Psalms. Part 1: Fearfully and Wonderfully, centers on Risner’s life story and Psalm 139. Part 2: Look on My Affliction, focuses on finding God in various trials. It is themed around Psalms 119, 42, 13, and 69. Part 3: Joy Comes with the Morning, is about pointing to the blessings God gives us in suffering, with an anchor in Psalm 30.Sustaining GraceThis book is less than 200 pages. 31 short chapters actually feel like reading devotions, but this doesn’t mean the content is shallow. Rather, these are some deep and difficult words to read. For instance, there are certain pains that I have not read much of in Christian books. The chapters on bullying and divorce come to mind, and she writes them candidly yet she still points us to Christ.While Risner writes with creativity, there are precious moments of practicality. In Ch 10: Talking Myself Through Suffering, she provides 7 principles to put suffering into perspective. Interestingly, in Ch.13: When the Detour Becomes the New Road, there is a section that seems perfect for our COVID-19 crisis and our need to adjust to a new normal. Risner helps us remember that God chooses our paths and he goes before us.Future GloryThis book does not shy away from anything, and it will call you to come closer to God. When the worst happens, when the pain never ends, and when you struggle to believe God loves you - these are all heavy chapters.But the book ends on a note of hope. Suffering is seen as a gift, and while this might be a hard pill to swallow, Risner writes with conviction and clarity. Fittingly, the book ends with the staggering promise of heaven. It is what we long for. And by his grace, we will arrive in glory.I was provided a media copy of The Scars that have Shaped Me and this is my honest review.
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Top reviews from the United States

  • Reviewed in the United States on May 23, 2017
    For the season I currently am in, this book has been super helpful. Vaneetha writes in a style that is honest and raw, a style that is much appreciated. She draws her strength from the Lord and writes in a way that gives a new angle to the joy of suffering. Her journey has been incredibly difficult. The manner she writes is short chapters that could literally take 10 minutes to read. The content is in-depth despite the short chapters.
    The chapter about Ruth and Naomi really was intriguing because Vaneetha brought out aspects of the story that I have never seen. I also gave it to one of our students at our church. She lost her brother nearly a year ago, at the time I am writing this review. When asked what stood out, she said that she can relate and that she, Vaneetha, puts words to the emotions she has had for this past year and was unable to express. I would highly recommend this book and a box of tissues!
    5 people found this helpful
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  • Reviewed in the United States on February 17, 2024
    I can't say enough about this book; a very genuine and straightforward account of trusting God from someone who has had more than their share of setbacks in life. Highly recommend.
  • Reviewed in the United States on February 14, 2020
    As someone who is in pain 100% of the time, this book drew me in immediately. It spoke of unanswered prayer and the value of a life which is comprised of pain and sitting on the sidelines. These are all relevant issues for me and although i have read everything I can get my hands on about the topic of suffering this book explored previously unencountered truths....It was not redundant or unnecessary in its message. I love how the issue of prayer is all throughout this book. Prayer is the one thing a person laid aside in sickness and pain, can still do. But first we must come to terms with the fact that our prayers may be answered differently than we would like...and not give up the faith. Thank you Vaneetha for a cogent, well-presented treatise on suffering, prayer, loss and heartache --and that you did not descend into gloom or hopelessness in its pages.
    6 people found this helpful
    Report
  • Reviewed in the United States on July 3, 2020
    I'm an avid reader. Over the course of life (mid-life now), I've read many, many books and articles that came close to me imaging myself via my experiences on the pages of a text. But this one captured me fully! My experiences are different, but the thoughts, emotions, even guilt at times left me in tears at times (that's a good thing because after feeling betrayed by so many people and God, at times) I was determined not to cry anymore. But through Vaneetha imprinting her heart on the pages of this text, it was redeeming for me in specifc areas and strengthening. Give yourself time in reading this text...like a 4-course meal, it is to be appreciated and not rushed. God's strength and hope be with you.
    One person found this helpful
    Report
  • Reviewed in the United States on April 12, 2021
    The story is heartbreaking yet beautiful. Encouraging words of wisdom. One thing that I didn't like though is that this could easily have been shortened by half. It bothers me when I buy books only to see that: 1. Margins are large, 2. Letters are large, 3. There's a lot of repeated information. Granted, this book is a compilation of blog posts, but still, I think the length of the book could have been reduced.
    2 people found this helpful
    Report
  • Reviewed in the United States on March 25, 2025
    Initially, I pushed back against reading this because her suffering was so much greater than my own, but what I found was that regardless of what form of suffering the Master leads any of us into, there are biblical truths that we can count on that we can use to help us walk through these hard times. One step at a time! Thank you for sharing your story, Vaneetha, and for the insight God provided to you from your times of suffering! We are all comforted because of it!
  • Reviewed in the United States on August 25, 2024
    Although my pain and struggles don’t even compare to those of Vaneetha and Joni, I found lots of good nuggets I can and will use with my minor pains. It is difficult for people to understand, and the fears, and the feelings of uselessness are almost impossible to describe. I found someone who understood in Vaneetha and that made a world of difference to me. No cure, but understanding. It’s a wonderful gift.
  • Reviewed in the United States on July 8, 2022
    The author shares from the heart and she gets it. She understands what sufferers go through. She doesn't sugar coat the pain and suffering as some authors do. She is real. I feel like I have friend when I read this book, AND, I feel like she is pointing me in the correct direction (Jesus) to get the mindset and heartset I need to deal with suffering. Wonderful book, highly recommended!
    2 people found this helpful
    Report

Top reviews from other countries

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  • Elaine
    5.0 out of 5 stars Excelente livro. Claro na explicação de q o sofrimento neste plano terreno é um processo de aperfeiçoamento para uma vida cristã madura. A leitura nos adverte sobre a frágil interpretação do q nos é graça amparadora, aquela que a graça de Deus trabalha em nós a cada dia, da graça libertadora/pontual, aquela q Deus trabalha por nós em um momento específico - milagre pontual.
    Reviewed in Brazil on January 24, 2018
    Não vos inquieteis, pois, pelo dia de amanhã; porque o dia de amanhã cuidará de si mesmo. Basta a cada dia o seu mal.
    Report
  • J. Austin
    5.0 out of 5 stars I would give more than 5 stars if possible
    Reviewed in the United Kingdom on April 1, 2017
    This book is one of the best books I have read about suffering. It is full of grace and truth, recognising that God allows us to be honest about our struggles and pain and wants to engage with us in the middle of them. It is not a 'preachy' book but it is packed full of wisdom and solid biblical teaching. Thank you Vaneetha for sharing your story with vulnerability and courage. It has encouraged me so much - to see that pain can be a gift, to recognise the value of sustaining grace, and also to pray in hope for deliverance, and to long for heaven.
  • KH
    4.0 out of 5 stars Inspiring and well-written
    Reviewed in Canada on December 3, 2019
    What an amazing testimony that expresses genuine faith forged through immense struggles and suffering. Vaneetha’s writing is so authentic as she shares her story while teaching practical wisdom grounded in scripture. She speaks on how to process grief, lament in a godly way, find peace and comfort in God’s sovereignty, and to use these lessons to encourage others. Very encouraging, touching, inspiring, and well-written.
  • Amazon Customer
    5.0 out of 5 stars Moving
    Reviewed in India on December 2, 2016
    What a moving example/testimony of endurance, through Christ.
  • jo
    3.0 out of 5 stars Too preachy
    Reviewed in Canada on October 31, 2021
    I admire the lady for everything she overcame but almost too good to be true