So you bought a phone for your kid and now you’re wondering how to deal with the reality of parenting a tween or teen with online access to the world? This is very good book to help you think through the issues, especially related to surveillance and privacy.
But my specialty is media literacy education, not parenting, so this review is primarily for educators. Teachers, librarians, and administrators will want to read Growing Up in Public because Heitner’s mantra – “mentoring not monitoring” – is the essence of media literacy education. It’s all about teaching skills and discussing important issues in ways that give students a voice in shaping decisions that have a major effect on their lives. The author models how to take concerns seriously without being alarmist and is clear that effective use of digital media devices is more about teaching kids how to care for themselves and make good judgements than it is about how to use the tech.
Also:
(1) You can recommend it to parents/guardians and if they follow its advice they will become your allies;
(2) Heitner’s interviews with kids and parents are reminiscent of dana boyd’s early work. They are revealing and will help you better understand your students and their families, including how kids create and participate in digital culture (see p. 146), why they engage in sexting or cyberbullying, and the ways in which much of what they do is what teens have always done, but “normal” looks different in a digital world (e.g., p. 56ff);
(3) Her research-based approach eschews oversimplification and spells out the complexities that are inherent to digital media use; and
(4) The book provides a very important, thoughtful discussion of ed tech policies and practices , especially in relation to classroom apps that involve grading and/or surveillance (think: eHallPass, ClassDojo, etc. – see p. 125ff).
Heitner effectively argues that tracking young people breeds mistrust. It gives them the message that they’re incapable and gives adults the illusion of providing protection (see, for example, p. 18) Monitoring, though occasionally appropriate, is ultimately much less effective than teaching kids the things that will actually help them develop the independence, confidence, and skills they need to keep themselves reasonably safe.
From cancel culture to college applications, Heitner manages to cover a wide range of digital media issues that blur boundaries between school, home, and community. Because the primary audience for the book is parents, she doesn’t use the phrases that will be familiar to media literacy educators. In fact, the phrase “media literacy” doesn’t appear on a single page (disappointing to someone in my position). Nevertheless, Heitner’s approach validates inclusion of reflection as a major media literacy competency. And her explanations are crystal clear in terms of why approaches based on scaring kids into compliance don’t work.
The one regrettable omission from the book is conversation prompts and sample dialogues. There are strong recommendations to talk with kids and why it is important to do so. But lots of adults, including educators, don’t know how to start the conversation or how to genuinely listen and respond to what young people say. It would have been nice to have some examples, especially from a variety of cultural perspectives.
Still, the book is a well-written, thoughtful piece on raising kids to be good people in the world they live in, which is a world with phones and social media, and AI. That’s a goal we all share, which makes this latest contribution by Heitner worth a read.
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Very Helpful Guide for Parents with Kids of all ages
I have two young kids at home who aren't on social media yet, but this book gave me ideas on how to get my kids ready so they can face the digital age with their best foot forward. I could see how it could be equally indispensable to parents of tweens, teens, etc. Would recommend!
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