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Bonnie Zucker
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Something Very Sad Happened: A Toddler’s Guide to Understanding Death Hardcover – August 15, 2016

by Bonnie Zucker (Author), Kim Fleming (Illustrator)
4.7 4.7 out of 5 stars 802 ratings
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Something Very Sad Happened is intended to be read to two- and three-year-old children to help them understand death and process the loss of a loved one.

When a loved one dies, it can be hard to know how to explain it to a young child, particularly if you are grieving the loss yourself. Written at a developmental level that is appropriate for two- and three-year-olds, the story explains death; lets children know that it is okay to feel sad; and reassures children that they can still love the person who died, and the person who died will always love them.

Since the two- to three-year-old child cannot read, this story is intended to be personalized; certain words are color-coded in red to cue to you to substitute with the appropriate names and pronouns for the person who died.

Includes an extensive Note to Parents and Caregivers with more information about talking to children about death, guidelines for answering a child’s questions, advice for attending funerals and visiting cemeteries, and ideas for commemorating the loved one.
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Previous page
  1. Reading age
    2 - 4 years, from customers
  2. Print length
    32 pages
  3. Language
    English
  4. Grade level
    Preschool - Kindergarten
  5. Dimensions
    8.25 x 0.25 x 10.25 inches
  6. Publisher
    Magination Press
  7. Publication date
    August 15, 2016
  8. ISBN-10
    9781433822667
  9. ISBN-13
    978-1433822667
  10. See all details
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From the Publisher

Something Very Sad Happened essential resource Booklist banner ad
Something Very Sad Happened art

When a loved one dies, it can be hard to explain it to a young child.

Sensitively written and gently illustrated, Something Very Sad Happened explains death in developmentally appropriate terms for two- and three-year-old children. It reassures the child that it is okay to feel sad, and that love never dies.

Editorial Reviews

From School Library Journal

PreS-K—No one likes to think about it, and even fewer plan for it, but explaining death to a toddler can be a difficult task. It is with this in mind, and from personal experience, that Zucker elected to write a book on death for this age set: two- and three-year-olds. She describes in simple terms what happens when someone dies. The author acknowledges that a book on death written just for little ones is a bit niche but emphasizes in the foreword the need to properly discuss this tough situation with young children. Proper names and pronouns within the story are written in red in order to be easily noticed and personalized when read aloud. The text is concise but heartfelt. Fleming's pencil and watercolor illustrations are done primarily in muted blues that set a melancholy tone and work well given the context. The narrative ends on a hopeful note ("Love cannot die") and is followed by tips and information about talking to kids about death. VERDICT An important book to have on hand for those who serve toddlers. It won't circulate every week, but it will come in handy when the need arises.—Lindsay Jensen, Nashville Public Library

Review

“No one likes to think about it, and even fewer plan for it, but explaining death to a toddler can be a difficult task…. The author acknowledges that a book on death written just for little ones is a bit niche but emphasizes in the foreword the need to properly discuss this tough situation with young children…. An important book to have on hand for those who serve toddlers.” —School Library Journal

“Essential, powerful, and psychologically researched resource to equip adults to model healthy grieving and help children at this age with loss.” —Booklist

“Something Very Sad Happened is impressively exceptional and an invaluable addition to family, preschool, elementary school, and community library collections.” —Midwest Book Review

Product details

  • ASIN ‏ : ‎ 1433822660
  • Publisher ‏ : ‎ Magination Press; 1st edition (August 15, 2016)
  • Language ‏ : ‎ English
  • Hardcover ‏ : ‎ 32 pages
  • ISBN-10 ‏ : ‎ 9781433822667
  • ISBN-13 ‏ : ‎ 978-1433822667
  • Reading age ‏ : ‎ 2 - 4 years, from customers
  • Grade level ‏ : ‎ Preschool - Kindergarten
  • Item Weight ‏ : ‎ 11 ounces
  • Dimensions ‏ : ‎ 8.25 x 0.25 x 10.25 inches
  • Customer Reviews:
    4.7 4.7 out of 5 stars 802 ratings

About the author

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Bonnie Zucker

Bonnie Zucker

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Dr. Bonnie Zucker is a licensed psychologist in private practice in Rockville, Maryland. She received her doctoral degree from Illinois School of Professional Psychology in Chicago and her Masters degree in Applied Psychology from the University of Baltimore. In her practice, Dr. Zucker specializes in the treatment of anxiety disorders in children and adults and utilizes a cognitive-behavioral (CBT) approach. Additionally, she integrates family systems work and helps parents learn the most appropriate responses to their child's anxiety disorder. Her books, Anxiety-Free Kids: An Interactive Guide for Parents and Children & Take Control of OCD: The Ultimate Guide for Kids with OCD, are modeled after her treatment methods. Dr. Zucker regularly conducts trainings on CBT for anxiety for mental health professionals.

Customer reviews

4.7 out of 5 stars
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802 global ratings
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Top reviews from the United States

Tori
5.0 out of 5 stars Simple but effective
Reviewed in the United States on May 2, 2024
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This made me cry but it certainly helps put the words in your mouth. Telling my daughter her dad is gone has been one of the hardest things I've ever had to do...I'm grateful this book exists and I appreciate the way they wrote it so you could alternate "who" has passed away in your life.
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Catalina Adams
5.0 out of 5 stars Beautiful book
Reviewed in the United States on April 13, 2024
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Super helpful:(
One person found this helpful
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Anna Parrish
5.0 out of 5 stars Provides helpful scripts around loss
Reviewed in the United States on December 26, 2023
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When my six year old son, Victor, passed away, I ordered this book literally while still in the hospital room. We had several children, including a toddler, and we needed words for a grief that is hard to express. The book is easy to personalize (proper nouns and pronouns are bolded so you can easily replace them) and we literally read it to our kids with our son's name and pronouns in it, personalizing it so that our toddler could understand. Children often need repetition to understand abstractions, like "death", and being able to pull this book off the shelf and read and reread it with our family was such a help in an incredibly difficult time. I send it to friends with kids who have losses, and keep a copy or two on hand for local friends. It has been a very helpful resource for our family. Even when we aren't directly reading the book, we quote many of the lines as scripts to answer questions around death and dying for our kids.
14 people found this helpful
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Jennifer J.
4.0 out of 5 stars Great guide.
Reviewed in the United States on July 7, 2020
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It's a nice guide to talking to your very young children about death. It's a great starting point to have when you are grieving and have to explain to very small children. We needed up not reading it to my little one, but the advice and ideas in it were good. I disagree with the author about a few pieces of advice given, but that's just a personal opinion. In general, it really helped us explain the death of a close family member to our 2 year old. It would also be easy to replace the loved one's name in the book to fit whomever you have lost. Some of the advice we did take has helped our little one understand why the person's we lost is no longer around and can't play.
6 people found this helpful
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Amazonial45
5.0 out of 5 stars Provides good, age-appropriate content.
Reviewed in the United States on December 13, 2023
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As a psychologist who works with the bereaved, I found this a helpful book. There really are not many that are written at the level of a young child's understanding. When death or loss occurs when a child is very young, the loss needs to be processed repeatedly at different levels of thinking and abstraction as the child grows up. This provides an excellent starting point.
10 people found this helpful
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Joy
5.0 out of 5 stars Thoughtfully written, works for preschoolers too
Reviewed in the United States on April 17, 2023
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This book is advertised for younger children but I read it to my almost 5 year old after her grandpa passed and I thought it was just right. I looked through lots of options and I thought this book along with the Lifetimes book were the best for preschool age children.

In case the author ever reads this: I'm so appreciative of what you've done with this book, including the advice for adults at the end. It's clear that you are an expert in this field but also have personally experienced this journey; what a valuable combination. I want to thank you in particular for one of the last sections where you talk about how the loved one will always have had an influence on our kid's lives even if they may not remember them anymore. That has brought me so much comfort and I look back on that quote often. Thank you.
25 people found this helpful
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AMF
5.0 out of 5 stars Great book
Reviewed in the United States on October 24, 2023
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I like how simple and straightforward this book is. Death is so taboo for so many that a lot of us want to use euphemistic language to talk about it. Somehow death, died/dead, and dying are kinda like dirty words we don't want to say. This book helps reduce the stigma around those words for my 4-year-old and even for myself. We are learning together.
5 people found this helpful
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Dr. Bonnie Zucker
5.0 out of 5 stars Reply to Jan 6th review entitled "Misrepresented"
Reviewed in the United States on January 9, 2023
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REPLY to January 6, 2023 review ("Misrepresented'): As the author, I am writing to clarify. In terms of this being a book exclusively for the loss of a Grandma, that is incorrect. Per the description: "Since the two- to three-year-old child cannot read, this story is intended to be personalized; certain words are color-coded in red to cue to you to substitute with the appropriate names and pronouns for the person who died." It is also explained in the beginning of the book that the words in RED (Grandma, she, her) are to be SUBSTITUTED for the person who passed. The book is written for 2-3 year olds who are too young to read; so the reader substitutes "Grandma" with "Aunt" and "Mommy" with "Grandma" if it's a Grandma who is reading to a child who has lost an Aunt. The book can be used for an Aunt, or any other relation/name. I hope this helps explain how the book is designed to be used.
92 people found this helpful
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Top reviews from other countries

R. Wong
5.0 out of 5 stars Great book for young toddlers
Reviewed in Canada on December 24, 2020
Verified Purchase
Book is very straightforward and good for keeping it simple but explanatory for a young toddler (simple sentences, repetitive words, blunt, etc). I looked through so many books but many geared to this age are about pets or allegorical in nature which make them more difficult for this age group to connect with a death of a person they know. This book is not like that at all - it states what happened and what type of emotions people may feel. Some reviewers did not like the battery comparison (I didn’t either) so I just changed the wording when I read that page to omit the battery part (it reads something like when you die, your body stops working. It is like when your toy stops working). This is hands down the best book I found for my 3-year old to explain and talk about the death of a loved one. Note: it is still not necessarily something she completely understands but this book was more straightforward and I got less questions after reading it (like about seeing the deceased etc)
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Amazon Customer
5.0 out of 5 stars Excellent book for young kids
Reviewed in the United Kingdom on September 18, 2022
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We lost my mither who had been living with us for most of my son's life. He was turning 4 soon and to find the words to explain why we are sad or angry or why she's not coming home again to someone so young was the hardest thing. In very simple words without talking about heaven or angels we were able to explain to him why his grandmother wasn't coming home again, why there was so many emotions in the house. It is an excellent book and it helped us more than we could imagine.
One person found this helpful
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A. Sullivan
5.0 out of 5 stars Absolutely Amazing for Toddlers
Reviewed in Canada on March 9, 2019
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This book explains death of a loved one perfectly for a 2-3 year old. It keeps things simple and direct. There is also a lot of great information about how to present the book to kids.
One person found this helpful
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MO104
4.0 out of 5 stars Lovely book for a sad occasipn
Reviewed in the United Kingdom on October 7, 2017
Verified Purchase
It’s a lovely book, well illustrated and addressed the emotions of loss. It puts the interchangeable words on bold so you can change it to the relevant person. Would be lovely if they did a version for Dad/Mum. This was grandma.
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